Back to School Success

Posted on by Sheri Dean Parmelee

Hi Everyone:

Congrats on being back in school. What in the world do you do now? Prepare, prepare, and do it. Here’s how:

When I was an undergrad (and even now that I teach), I would buy an academic month-at-a-glance calendar. I use different colored pens for each class and mark off all of the assignments (including reading assignments) that I had for each class. One English class might be blue ink; another class would be green; still another was red or purple. (Write the number of the class in the same color ink next to the assignments or you will get hopelessly lost. You will, however, have a very colorful book!)

When there was a major assignment, I would highlight it with a yellow marker, to make it stand out. In fourteen years as a college student, I only forgot one assignment. I had forgotten to look at my calendar and was going off of my memory. Oops!

Keep that calendar with you at all times. Is this old-fashioned? Yes. Does it ever crash? No. Does it require that you charge it at night? No. It simply sits there and works.

I hope this helps!

Best,

Dr. Sheri

It Doesn’t Get Any Better Than This

Posted on by Sheri Dean Parmelee

Hi everyone:

I had the MOST fun this afternoon. My colleagues and I got to do a “meet and greet” for incoming freshmen.

Their wide-eyed looks, frozen silence, and unabashed youthfulness were charming. They sat silently during our informal presentation. Two of them were accompanied by parents. Here were about 20 young people, standing (or, in their case, sitting) on the brink of their adulthood.

It was so exciting to me, as a faculty member, to give them some college success tips and share what our school within the university was all about.

When we broke up into smaller groups, we had the chance to find out about their hopes, their dreams, their aspirations. What fun! I pray that these young people, like thousands of other students spread out across the campus, will find God’s will for their lives and do it. There is no greater joy than to find out what God wants you to do for Him and then work hard so that you can do it.

I remember my own calling to become a college professor. I was standing in Dr. Klumpps’ COM451 class, talking to a graduate student (I was a junior but it was a bridge class that also had graduate students). As I stood there, I turned and looked at the row of desks that had students waiting for the class to begin. I heard a voice saying, “This is is what I have for you, my daughter.” I knew the Lord was giving me the work He had for me to do.

Some people get a calling to go on the foreign mission field. I applaud their dedication and willingness to go to other lands and cultures. But my calling, no less important, is to minister to students. I praise the Lord for that opportunity and ministry.

So, welcome, freshmen. I wish you well.

Best,

Dr. Sheri

The Perfect Storm of Assignments or I’m Terribly Late on my Homework so What Do I do Now?

Posted on by Sheri Dean Parmelee

Hello everyone:

This may be crunch time for your assignments. It is for a couple of my summer classes.

You know how it is: it’s summertime. You don’t feel like doing your homework. It’s a nice day. Your spouse or kids want to go to the pool. You agree to go, for a little while. Next thing you know, that “little while” turns into all afternoon (or evening) and when you get home you are too bushed by your day in the sun to do anything.

Yep, I understand. I know what it means to turn down the chance to do something fun when you have homework to do. But when that lovely day in the sun is a distant memory (or a bad sunburn) you will have a real wake up call. Your homework didn’t do itself while you were taking time off.

Here’s what I suggest for next time and then I’ll offer suggestions for what to do now that the perfect storm is upon you.

Set an oven timer. Tell whoever wants to distract you from your work that you have to work for 45 more minutes and then you’ll go with them to the beach or to the pool or wherever your wanderlust takes you.

Plan your work ahead of time so that, when you want to do something fun, you will have scheduled some goof-off time into your day. (I had a student once who told me she had to make dinner for her hubby’s birthday. I asked her if she hadn’t known it was coming up; it’s kinda like those folks who wait until Christmas eve to go Christmas shopping or people who wait until April 14th to do their taxes.The gal didn’t appreciate my sense of humor. She never finished the course, apparently having other meals to cook.)

Okay, that’s planning ahead, but what do you do for that pile of assignments that are waiting for you right now? Clear your calendar immediately, and plan to have some long nights over the next few days.

You can email the professor and ask for an extension but it might be refused. If you are a student using financial aid, the professor might actually have to compute your grades early, to get the final grades in so that you can continue your education. That puts us in a double bind: you will turn your work in late and then we have to readjust our schedules so that we can still get your grades in on time for you to get more financial aid. This will not endear you to your professor, believe you me.

My suggestion? Do your work, plan ahead, and don’t expect the professor to bail you out. We usually have between 100 to 150 students at a time and your failure to plan is not an emergency in our minds.

Best,

Dr. Sheri

The Difference Between Whining and Having Real Concerns

Posted on by Sheri Dean Parmelee

Hello everyone:

Sometimes in group work, one of the partners does all the work “because it’s easier than asking someone to help.” But that defeats the purpose. The only thing one member learns is to be a free loader. The other teammate feels put upon. Neither learns to work as a team.

I was in a group once where we had to write a 42-page paper. I had two teammates, one of whom did not understand the concept of citing sources and the other who contributed “nice job, guys” and “my name is spelled with a “ph” instead of a “v.”

In the case of the former, I went back and inserted every one of his massive amounts of non-cited sentences (his part was essentially a huge copy-and-paste from the work of others). Yes, I had to read all of his sources at the last minute so that I would know where the citations belonged.

For the other fellow, there wasn’t anything I could do, except to deny him a letter of reference for a job he wanted a few weeks later. (Was he kidding? I wasn’t going to recommend him for a bus boy job, much less a position in academia- with apologies to bus boys!)

So what are you to do? Please let the professor know what you are going through BUT please do not wait until it’s too late for us to do anything about it. Let us know if someone is not participating a couple of weeks into a project. Don’t tell us on day two that “Matilda isn’t answering the 57 emails I sent her since close of business yesterday,” but do tell us if someone seems to be ignoring your missives.

Case in point: I had a graduate level major league project due in two days and one of the teammates posted on the team’s discussion board area, “When do you want to meet to discuss the case?” It was due in TWO days!!! It was worth a boatload of points! What was the student thinking????

Fortunately, her teammate had let me know about the issue a few weeks back and I allowed the first teammate to work alone. As for the other gal, she flunked the class.

Best,

Dr. Sheri

The True Measure of a Person

Posted on by Sheri Dean Parmelee

Hello everyone:

Believe it or not, you can tell a lot about a potential spouse or significant other by how he or she plays a game and how he or she behaves in college.

One of my previous blog postings talked about my beloved Mexican Train Dominoes and I got some excellent feedback on that subject (about the dominoes, not the choice of a spouse).

There’s an old saying that goes, “Win without boasting. Lose without excuse.” That’s a good strategy for college students, as well as picking a spouse.

How does someone behave when he or she gets a bad grade? Does the person verbally attack the professor or blame the instructions or the circumstances or the time of day or the weather?

If the person blames everyone but him or herself, then the person will eventually put responsibility for everything bad that happens on you. Keep this in mind as you make decisions about your future with the individual. Do you really want to accept that kind of burden?

So, enjoy playing games, but keep a close eye on behavior. It really does make a difference.

Best,

Dr. Sheri

Taking a Break is Fine but Don’t Forget to Get Back to Work

Posted on by Sheri Dean Parmelee

Hello everyone:

Many of my students are taking the summer off…to work. That’s a good thing, refreshing their minds, getting some work experience or internships done. Perhaps you will do the same thing.

Or maybe you are the kind of person who is soldiering on, taking classes during the summertime in an effort to get ahead a bit. Both are good ideas.

Even if you are working or going to school this summer, it’s still a good idea to take a little time to rejuvenate before heading back to classes in the fall.

What is your idea of a great way to spend a few days? Are you a mountain or a beach kind of person?

Asking the Professor for a Conference

Posted on by Sheri Dean Parmelee

Hello everyone:

Have you ever had a professor who marked down your papers and you couldn’t figure out what was wrong?

When I was in graduate school for my master’s degree, I had one professor who automatically took five points off of every paper, for what she said were “grammar problems.” I asked her what she meant and she just told me that everyone makes mistakes, so she always took off the points.

Poppycock and balderdash! (Forgive me for being redundant here!)

While I am willing to admit to not being perfect, neither am I so flawed that every paper has major mess ups. I went through my documents and, out of the entire semester, I only found one typo. There were no grammar, punctuation, or wording mistakes.

I asked her for a meeting. She refused but gave me a 100 on the next paper, saying that the grade made up for the other errors. (She was obviously not gifted at math, since one paper that was not marked down five points does not bring up five other papers that lost a total of 25 points.)

So, what is a student to do? Ask for a meeting. I was rebuffed by my professor but that doesn’t mean that you will be, as well. Be polite, not rude. Be firm but not unbending. You may actually be wrong, so be gracious. Because you handled the situation nicely, the professor may actually give you some of the points back and may be kinder to you next time.

Best,

Dr. Sheri

Posted on by Sheri Dean Parmelee

Welcome to the Wonderful World of Mexican Train Dominoes or How to Pick a Mate

Hello everyone:

As I was playing Mexican Train Dominoes last night, I thought how it would be a great way to pick a potential mate. Stay with me on this for a minute- I know it sounds weird.

How does the person playing against you handle victory? Defeat? Are the other players Type A or Type B personalities? It makes a huge difference in how they play a competitive game, you know.

How does the other person handle losing hand after hand? Does he or she become sullen? Moody? Keep in mind that this is only a game but does he or she take it so seriously that it is impossible to have fun?

How is this person when he or she wins? Does the individual brag or is the person gracious? When talking about the game, does the person congratulate others on a game well-played?

Think about this for a minute or two. How would you like this person as a potential spouse? You will, obviously, have to observe more than one game, but how does the individual treat you? Like your head is full of rocks or as if you are a complete incompetent? Or is the other person’s approach one of condescension, as if someone with your IQ couldn’t win if you were spotted a boatload of points?

On the other hand, is the other one’s attitude that you are a fully capable person who just got a lousy hand?

It makes a HUGE difference, you know. While playing Mexican Train Dominoes might not seem like a good way to pick one’s future spouse, I think this idea has merit. What do you think?

Best,

Dr. Sheri

Banana Bread Dreams

Posted on by Sheri Dean Parmelee

Hi everyone:

My mother passed along a fantastic banana bread recipe to me and I would love to share it with you today. Here goes:

Two large, overripe bananas (with lots of brown spots on the skin)

1 stick of margarine or butter, softened

2 cups of flour

1/2 cup chopped pecans (if desired)

1/2 cup of sugar

I egg

I teaspoon of baking soda

Preheat your oven to 350 degrees

Mash the bananas and set them aside. Cream the butter and add sugar. Beat in the egg. Add the bananas. Add the baking soda and add the flour a little at a time as you mix these ingredients. Mix the ingredients until the flour disappears.

Pour the mixture into a greased and floured loaf pan. Bake 50 minutes.

I hope you enjoy it!

Best,

Dr. Sheri

Marrying before Graduation

Posted on by Sheri Dean Parmelee

Hello everyone:

I meet young people every day who chose to get married before graduating from college. The question is: Should you do this or should you wait?

Let’s go through some pros and cons.

The pros include being married to your soul mate (please note that no one has ever told me that she is marrying someone who isn’t her soulmate).

Being able to have a socially-acceptable intimate relationship.

Knowing that you don’t have to scramble for a date.

Having the peace of mind that says someone loves you enough to commit his or her life to you (though I did attend a wedding where the groom promised to stay married as long as he loved his bride. She promised the same thing. They are having problems only a few years in. No surprise there).

Companionship, friendship, and deep love can be fully expressed.

The cons include removing yourself from the dating scene before you are fully grown up.

Having to consider his or her wants and needs before you do your homework, which takes your focus off of your studies.

Having to be a cook, maid, and laundry person for someone besides yourself.

Facing the possibility of pregnancy at finals time.

Being confronted with a spouse who finds you “boring” because you are studying “all the time” and dropping out of college before you complete your degree.

So, what are you to do? If you were asking me, I would wait for the “I do’s” until after college. Take it from me. I dropped out of college four times before I finally decided to “get it done.” It took me 30 years to get back to school. Don’t wait that long. It’s better to wait now, than to not wait and have to wait.

Best,

Dr. Sheri