College Life

Posts about college life, students, professors, and grades.

Why are you in college?

Posted on by Sheri Dean Parmelee

Hello everyone:

Sometimes I wonder why students go to college. They tell me that it’s to stay on their parents’ insurance or to avoid having to find a job or to keep their folks off of their back…..or something else.

While I appreciate the honesty of these students, it would be fun to hear that someone absolutely loves learning. One student that I asked about his reason for going to college told me “Well, the judge said I had a choice between prison or college, so I chose college.” I thought, “Oh, goodie, goodie gumdrops and you chose my class.”

I still don’t know what crime he was convicted of but every time there was too much noise outside our classroom, I sent him to quiet things down…..and he did, very successfully. He also got a very good grade in my course….he earned it; he didn’t intimidate me into it.

My question for you is: why are you here? What are your goals, dreams, ambitions? What can your professors do to help you achieve? Most of us are here because we love teaching students. Some of us feel actually “called” to do this work. How can I, as a professor, help you make it?

Best,

Dr. Sheri

Communicating with the professor or how not to argue with someone who is trying to help you

Posted on by Sheri Dean Parmelee

Hello everyone:

I recently received an email from a student whose rough draft I had gone over. I gave him feedback using the rubric that I will be using to grade his final document.

He argued with me.

Now, please understand that it takes time for me to go through a student’s document a line at a time and give him suggestions on how to get a better grade. Do you know how many times one of my professors did that for me? Never as an undergrad or as a master’s student. Not once, until I got to my dissertation, which was 13 years after I started college.

But this kid argued.

He wanted to do the assignment his own way because he thought it “looked better.” Well, maybe it would, in his opinion, but I am the boss in the class. (And my boss gave me the rubric for the course that my boss designed…..he’s the chair of the department, so I do things his way.)

When he gets out of the service and gets into the real world of business, his boss will be the boss. His boss may or may not care how he writes a document but it is my goal for this person to be as prepared for the real world as possible. That is also my boss’ goal.

So don’t argue, just do it.

Best,

Dr. Sheri

Redundancy can be very redundant or how not to write a college essay

Posted on by Sheri Dean Parmelee

Hello everyone:

I received a college essay from a student recently who, basically, said the same thing over and over, again and again, redundantly. Like I just did there.

Folks, you need to have more than one line of text in your essays or they get…..boring. In this case, he wrote one line as his introduction paragraph. (Please note: introductions need to be more than one line.)

His second paragraph began and ended with the same line and without much in between.

Guess how his third paragraph started? Yep. The same line, yet again. Ditto on the end of the third paragraph and the beginning and end of the fourth paragraph.

Wanna take a shot at what the one-sentence concluding paragraph contained? You guessed it. (Please note that conclusions, like introductions,  should also be more than one sentence.)

I hope this helps with your plans to write an essay. I haven’t said much, but have hopefully said a lot herein!

Best,

Dr. Sheri

Doing well or doing the minimum

Posted on by Sheri Dean Parmelee

Hello everyone:

Each semester, I run into students who just barely get by. If I ask for two-five sentence paragraphs, they give me one five-sentence paragraph, or less. Sometimes they write three sentences, if you include “great post,” which I don’t.  My question for them is: why did you even bother?

If I ask that all posting be completed by Sunday night at 11:30 pm ET, they will send me an email showing that they live on the west coast and that they therefore deserve three extra hours. They use more energy fighting with me than they expend in doing the work. Like the famous tennis shoe commercial says, Just Do It.

I had a student recently who announced that she is a “once a week student.” That won’t fly, folks. College takes a lot more than one day a week. So, she’s going to do all of her reading, all of her writing, and all of her projects in one day? Who is she kidding?

A while back, I had a class that met only on Saturday mornings. After the first class meeting, one student came up to me and said, “I thought that, because we meet on Saturday mornings, there wouldn’t be any homework.” Yes, she was serious.  I told her that it didn’t matter what day of the week a class was held, this is college and there is going to be homework. She was in shock but she did step up to the plate and got things done.  (She had also signed up for a Saturday afternoon class- I wonder if she was related to Ms. Once-A-Week Student? Apparently, she was going to get all of her college degree work done in class on Saturday.)

What experience have you had with students who didn’t apply themselves? Are you one of them?

Best,

Dr. Sheri

The first day of school is tomorrow-what do I do now?

Posted on by Sheri Dean Parmelee

Hello everyone:

Watching school buses pick up their children this morning, I began wondering what my students in college are planning for their first day of fall semester tomorrow.

Have they visited our class webpage and read my first announcements, including the one that tells them to bring a copy of the syllabus to class with them, or do they figure that I printed it out and will hand it to them when they show up?

Do they have the book for the class, or will they make a quick scramble to the bookstore tomorrow, along with half of the student population (only to discover that the book is sold out and they can’t get it for the first three weeks of class)?

Will they have paper and pen, ready to take notes, or will they think that nothing important will be done tomorrow and blow off the idea of even showing up?

Will they prepare their backpack today, making sure that they have all the supplies they need for their classes, or will they run around first thing in the morning, trying to pull everything together at the last minute?

Will they lay out their outfit tonight, making sure that it is in good repair, or will they show up in their pajamas?

Will they make sure that their car is gassed up, their laptop is charged up, and their eyes are opened up, or will they run out of gas halfway there, string the cord for their charger across the room (which becomes a tripping hazard for everyone in the room), and sit in their chairs, barely awake because they stayed awake playing computer games half the night?

Well, I guess you can tell which route a successful student will take. The second choices, all the way through, are for students whose success is doubtful. See you tomorrow!

Best,

Dr. Sheri

Before you fail read the instructions

Posted on by Sheri Dean Parmelee

Hello everyone:
I received an email from a student today. Her note made it very clear that she had not read the announcements or the syllabus before posting her first assignment.

While I am the first to agree that a syllabus will probably never make the Best Seller list with Amazon, there is important information in it that could dramatically affect your grade.

First, she did not know any deadlines. (They are in both the syllabus and in the first announcement for the class, which I have repeatedly asked students to read.) Key: Read it before you write an assignment.

Second, she was unaware that there were any length requirements on discussion board postings. (Those instructions are at the end of the question, so she obviously did not scroll down one more line, where she would have located it.) Key: If you do not meet the minimum length requirements, you might not get credit for doing anything. Key: If you always post brief postings, your teacher gets very annoyed for your wasting her time. You obviously wanted credit; you just felt like doing a poor job. She notices and makes note that you are lazy. Guess what happens to lazy students if they need a curve at the end of the semester because they are “that close” to the next grade?

Finally, she did not want to participate in the Free Feedback Thursday where she would receive free (what a surprise) feedback that she could use to improve her paper and end up with a better grade. She didn’t want to work that hard. (One student told me “I never do re-writes.” His final grade reflected that attitude.)

The take-away here is…well, you are in college, what do you think?

Best,

Dr. Sheri

Graduating Somma Latte

Posted on by Sheri Dean Parmelee

Hello everyone:

Today’s blog is about how not to get a higher grade. I had a student recently who asked me to curve her grade by a half letter grade, so she could graduate “somma latte.” After I figured out that she meant “summa cum laude,” we were in better shape. She still didn’t get her 1/2 grade level curve, but at least I understood what she was asking for. (I thought she was ordering at Starbucks, for a moment. That sounds like something they would serve, doesn’t it?)

Sadly, she waited until the last week of class to figure out the numbers. She said that, if she got an A in just one more class, she could have honors at graduation. I’m impressed that she was that close to the goal, but the time to figure something like that out is well before the last week of class.

When I turned her down for the curve, she asked for the opportunity to re-take the final exam. She felt she could do much better on it, if she had a second go at the test. Yes, that makes perfect sense. She would have already known what the questions were, and would have had the chance to look up the answers. She did not get that, either.

When it came down to the final numbers, she was still a good student. She could still graduate “cum laude.” There was only one problem. There was no honor graduation for graduate students at that school.

What is your take on this situation? Was she trying to snow me for a higher grade? What do you think she was up to here? I would love to get your input!

Best,

Dr. Sheri

Extra Credit Woes

Posted on by Sheri Dean Parmelee

Hello everyone:

As an instructor, I offer undergraduates the opportunity to earn extra credit throughout the semester. However, that opportunity is dried up two weeks before the end of the term.

Why? Because I am a grading machine at that point in time and I don’t have the time or desire to take a student who has goofed off all semester and add to my own burden when things are winding down.

When is it good to seek extra credit? From the very start of the course, not two days before final grades are due. If I see a student who has worked hard all term, has done every bit of extra credit all semester, I am more likely (but not guaranteed) to look kindly on that individual at final grades time.

When can you get extra credit in graduate school? Never. End of sentence.

Best,

Dr. Sheri

Excuseitis and other diseases of college students

Posted on by Sheri Dean Parmelee

Hello everyone:

I recently had a student who had inflammatory excuseitis. She gave excuses, and I became inflamed towards her.

This lady had every excuse in the book to not come to class.  The key here is to remember we are talking about an eight week course.

Week one to week one and a half: She had the flu (Hey, it’s an online course. It’s not like she’s contagious or something. Come to class long enough to let us know that you are still among the living and then do your homework in the bathroom, if need be. We promise not to look.)

Week one and a half to week two and a half: Her kids had the flu and she had to take care of them. (But you told me your kids were in their late teens- can’t they kinda take care of themselves?)

Week two and a half through week three: She had a lot of housework to catch up on. (She and her kids had been sick, as you know, and she had laundry to do.)

Week four: She and her hubby had this cruise planned forever. You can’t expect her to miss it, can you? The tickets were non-refundable. “Non-refundable” means we can’t get our money back, in case you have never been on a cruise.  (You know those kids from week one and a half through week two? Apparently they were okay to leave home alone. And, no, I haven’t ever been on a cruise, but I know what “non-refundable”means.)

Week five: Whew, she was so tired from the cruise and there was laundry to do (because the kids didn’t do it. It’s not going to do itself, you know.) Okay, I will be in class later this week…..maybe.

Week six: Okay, it’s time to get a handle on things here. Dr. Parmelee, I need to make up some work. You know I’ve had some problems this semester, so it would be great if you could waive the late assignment penalty for the last six weeks. I’m still able to make an A in this class, right? My funding requires that I make at least an B or I have to pay them back. That would be a financial hardship for me, would destroy my credit, and would really mess up my life if you don’t cut me a break……

Week seven: I don’t have ANY IDEA how to do the first five assignments. Your instructions are the pits. Oh, by the way, I don’t have my textbook yet because I seem to have forgotten to order it, but it will be here by the end of next week. That’s okay, right?

Week eight: I don’t know how the time slipped away from me but I am ALMOST ready to turn in the second assignment, so you can cut me a break here, right? Is there any extra credit I can do to bring up my GPA? I mean, there’s this really cool paper I wrote for another class and got an A on so I could just turn it in to you. My other professor already marked it up and everything, so you would just need to post the grade. It’s an A, if I didn’t mention it…..

Surely you jest, lady!

Best,

Dr. Parmelee

P.S. I would love to hear your sob story. What’s the best excuse you have ever heard (or told?). Names will be changed to protect the guilty. 🙂

Why do college book publishers release new editions?

Posted on by Sheri Dean Parmelee

Hello everyone:

Why do you think college book publishers release new editions? Can there really be that much new stuff since their last edition? Well, guess what? College professors usually don’t like the new editions any better than you do.

Why, you might ask? Because, while you cannot sell your textbook to your friends coming up through college after you, we have to re-do all of our Power Points and texts.

College book publishers release new editions so that they can take an already-successful book and give you the most up-to-date information, but they also like to have a cash cow keep producing. If they don’t update the book, then folks will keep buying and re-buying the same book on the secondary book market. There’s no money for them in that!

My current communication textbook is an outstanding book by a well-respected author. It is now on the 14th edition. Most new editions come out every two years or thereabouts. I have been teaching college for 12 years. You do the math on how often I have updated my lectures and examinations.

It’s taking me the better part of three afternoons to do my own update and I still have more than half the book to go and all of the tests and assignments to fix. Add to that the fact that my former students now own a book that is worthless (since all of my lectures and exams will come from the new book), and you see the dilemma here.

I have complete sympathy for your situation as a seller of the old textbook; maybe you can see now that we are in similar, though not the same, boat. How do you feel about the whole thing?

Best,

Dr. Sheri